Seagull study
There was a biology student who was studying equilibrium in sea birds. He proposed that giving measured doses of various hallucinogenic substances and observing their flight patterns would give some insight to the problems of equilibrium in three dimensional space. This tale taking place in a more liberal era, the student got the funding. He filled out mountains of forms, set up a lab with a supply of sea birds, and proceeded on his way. After a year of diligent work, grovelling monthly before the review committee to get his stipend and living with stoned sea birds, he completed his study.
With trembling hands, he delivered his mammoth report, complete with charts and graphs, to the review committee. This august body perused his study, asking penetrating questions and reducing our student to a quivering jelly. Finally, the department head stood up. The light reflected off her steel rimmed glasses as she stared down at our student.
"There is a lot of good work here," she said. "But we can't accept this report. You have detailed marvellously the effects of all these substances on these sea birds, but you have no control group."
Our student turns pale and says, "You don't mean..."
"Yes. I'm afraid so...
You left no tern un-stoned."
author unknown
The Coffee
A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee.
When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said, "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee in most cases, it’s just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink.
What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups... and then began eyeing each other's cups.
Now consider this: Life is the coffee, and the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of life we live. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee."
author unknown
